Aquinas College Campus Safety announced on Tuesday that it will relocate its headquarters across campus, but will remain in the same building.

“We had looked at several pre-fabricated options,” said an official with the department. “But we decided it made financial sense just to pack up the trailer and hit the road.”

Campus Safety originally considered lifting the trailer of its foundation with a crane, but instead decided to enlist the horsepower of its flagship Town and Country minivan in pulling the trailer toward its new home on the lawn near Touchdown Mary.

“The new, central location will give us the ability to respond in a faster manner,” said another official who declined to be named. The department is also considering a mobile, amphibious unit to be based at Wege Pond.

“Can’t be too careful,” said a Campus Safety officer writing tickets in the Fulton Lot while the unoccupied Town and Country sat with the engine running more than 200 feet away. “We’re a sustainable college, and that means we’ve got to be ready by land, air and sea.”

In the event that the minivan is unable to pull the trailer across campus, Campus Safety plans on issuing a call for student volunteers to help push it to its new home. There is a blessing of the trailer scheduled for 3 p.m. Thursday at Touchdown Mary.

The trailer, which was abandoned by construction crews after the completion of the Academic Building in 1955, features a 50 cent pop machine, intended to finance the eventual construction of a new trailer and the addition of a rear spoiler on the minivan.

“We’ve got wind resistance working against us right now,” Campus Safety said in a recent assessment of its capabilities. “But we do have the element of surprise.”

Just weeks ago, Campus Safety failed to apprehend a suspect after its Town and Country was mistaken for the “team mom” by a herd of cookie and juice-box seeking soccer players, who swarmed the van.